Existential Crisis
Over the last few years, I have found myself in the throes of an existential crisis several times. I have questioned everything, especially my faith. I have questioned the true existence of my God and the Christian faith in general. The reasons for these questions have largely been intellectual.
I have thought about the fact that there are so many religions out there, and some have been around for a really long time. I had a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea that mine was the only legitimate religion. Followers of many of these religions believe that they are right—that theirs is the true religion. This led me on a search to see what evidence actually exists for what I believe and why I should believe Christianity is true.
Proof and Evidence
The simple truth is that God cannot be proven or disproven in the same way we can prove something through a scientific experiment. Many polytheistic religions have gods that have never been seen, yet have been worshiped for thousands of years. The Bible itself contains accounts in which the God of Israel, Yahweh, is contrasted with the gods worshiped by surrounding peoples. In those accounts, those gods fail to act while Yahweh does.
Of course, I cannot prove that every one of those events occurred exactly as the Bible records it. They happened thousands of years ago. Like other events from antiquity, our knowledge of them comes through texts, archaeology, and traditions that have survived from the ancient world.
But that does not mean there is no evidence.
In fact, one of the things I discovered during my search is that there is a difference between proof and evidence.
Archaeology cannot dig up God. It cannot prove that a miracle was caused by Him. What archaeology can do is investigate the historical world described in the Bible. Archaeologists and scholars have found evidence for numerous people, places, cultures, political circumstances, and events described in Scripture.
The Bible and Archaeology
One example comes directly from the New Testament. The Gospels tell us that Jesus was sentenced to crucifixion while Pontius Pilate was the Roman governor of Judea. Pilate is not known to us only because the Bible mentions him. An inscription discovered at Caesarea bears his name and title, providing archaeological evidence for the Roman governor described in the New Testament.
Caiaphas, the Jewish high priest named in the Gospel accounts surrounding the death of Jesus, also belongs to this historical setting. An ornate first-century ossuary discovered near Jerusalem bears the name associated with Caiaphas and has been identified by the Israel Museum with the high priest known from this period.
The Old Testament has its own archaeological connections. Ancient inscriptions, cities, rulers, kingdoms, and events have been discovered that illuminate the world described by its writers. The Dead Sea Scrolls are particularly important—not because they prove that every event in the Old Testament happened, but because they contain extremely ancient copies of books of the Hebrew Bible. Among them are numerous manuscripts of Isaiah, including the remarkably well-preserved Great Isaiah Scroll. These discoveries demonstrate that these biblical writings existed long before the medieval manuscripts upon which scholars once had to rely.
That distinction matters. Archaeology does not prove the theological claim that God inspired Scripture, but it does show that the Bible is rooted in a real ancient world that we can investigate.
The Historical Jesus
The same is true when we come to Jesus.
The existence of Jesus does not depend solely upon Christian writings. Non-Christian ancient sources also refer to Him and the early Christian movement. The first-century Jewish historian Josephus refers to James as the brother of “Jesus, who was called Christ.” The Roman historian Tacitus later wrote that Christus, from whom Christians received their name, had suffered the death penalty during the reign of Tiberius at the hands of Pontius Pilate.
These writers were not Christians trying to spread the Gospel. Their writings do not prove that Jesus was the Son of God or that He rose from the dead, but they provide evidence outside the New Testament that Jesus was a real historical person and that the Christian movement was not invented centuries later.
Even the New Testament itself is much closer to the events it describes than I once realized. Paul’s letters began appearing only a few decades after Jesus’ crucifixion, while people who had lived during the time of Jesus were still alive. The Gospels and other New Testament writings arose within the first century of the Christian movement.
What About the Miracles?
That still leaves an enormous question: What about the miracles?
The earliest Christian writings portray Jesus not merely as a teacher, but as a man who performed extraordinary works—healings, exorcisms, and other events His followers understood as miracles and signs of His authority. History can establish that these claims about Jesus are ancient. It cannot scientifically recreate a miracle from two thousand years ago and prove that it happened through divine power.
The same is true of the central claim of Christianity: the resurrection of Jesus.
We can historically investigate the crucifixion of Jesus. We can investigate the writings of His earliest followers. We can establish that belief in His resurrection was present extremely early in Christianity and became the very foundation of the Christian movement. But whether God actually raised Jesus from the dead is ultimately a question that history alone cannot settle for me.
And that brings me back to what it all boils down to:
Faith.
When Doubt Leads to Faith
I have come to understand that having doubts does not necessarily mean that my faith has failed. My doubts forced me to examine what I believe, why I believe it, and whether there are reasonable grounds for that belief. Doubt has helped my faith grow.
According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, one definition of faith is a “firm belief in something for which there is no proof.”
The Holy Bible says in Hebrews 11:1:
“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.”
Christianity is built around faith—faith that the things passed down in Scripture are true, that God is real, that His Son is Jesus Christ, and that what Jesus said about Himself, God, humanity, forgiveness, salvation, and eternal life is true.
However, I have discovered that there is evidence to go along with my faith.
There is history. There are ancient manuscripts. There is archaeology. There are Christian and non-Christian sources. There are real people and places that intersect with the biblical accounts. There are writings from the earliest Christians showing that their belief in Jesus, His crucifixion, and His resurrection did not suddenly appear hundreds of years later.
But none of that can put God under a microscope.
Eventually, evidence can only take me so far. At some point, I have to decide what I believe the evidence means.
And when I look at Jesus, I find compelling reasons to believe.
Why I Believe in Jesus
Christianity presents a God who does not remain distant from humanity but enters into our suffering. In Jesus, I see love, mercy, and grace. I see someone who ate with sinners, touched the untouchable, cared for the rejected, forgave people who did not deserve forgiveness, and taught His followers to love even their enemies.
The Old Testament tells the story of God’s covenant relationship with Israel and the sacrificial system through which His people approached Him. Christians believe that this story ultimately points toward Jesus. Jesus was sent as the final atoning sacrifice, and through Him the invitation was extended to both Jews and Gentiles.
The Gospel was not to remain confined to one ethnic group or geographical region. Jesus commanded His followers to carry His message to the nations. Through Christ, people from every nation and background could become part of the family of God.
The New Testament goes so far as to say that those who belong to Christ are children of God and “co-heirs with Christ.”
That is one of the things about Christianity that I find so beautiful.
God does not merely tell me to somehow make myself worthy enough to reach Him. Christianity teaches that God came to us. Jesus lived among us, suffered among us, and ultimately gave Himself for us. Christians believe that through His death and resurrection, He provided the way for sinful human beings to be reconciled to God—not because we managed to become perfect, but because of His mercy and grace.
Can I prove every part of that?
No.
I cannot prove God with an equation. I cannot scientifically reproduce the resurrection. I cannot travel two thousand years into the past and watch Jesus walk out of the tomb.
There has never been a moment in my search when every possible question disappeared.
But I have also realized that unanswered questions do not require me to abandon everything I believe.
I can examine the evidence. I can acknowledge where the evidence ends. I can admit what I do not know. And then I can decide where I will place my faith.
I Choose to Believe
Based upon these reasons, I choose to believe.
I choose to believe in the One True God.
I choose to believe in Jesus Christ, in all that He said, and in the life He lived.
I choose to believe that He died and rose again.
I choose to believe that He is coming again to bring us to Himself.
I choose to trust Him even when I still have questions.
This is my choice.
“But if it doesn’t please you to worship the LORD, choose for yourselves today: Which will you worship—the gods your ancestors worshiped beyond the Euphrates River or the gods of the Amorites in whose land you are living? As for me and my family, we will worship the LORD.” —Joshua 24:15
by: Kimberly Hardy
Sources & Further Reading
The Pilate Stone — Israel Museum
The archaeological inscription discovered at Caesarea mentioning Pontius Pilate and identifying him as the Roman prefect of Judea.
Caiaphas Ossuary — Israel Museum
Information about the first-century ossuary bearing the name associated with Caiaphas, the Jewish high priest.
The Dead Sea Scrolls — Israel Museum / Shrine of the Book
Information about the Dead Sea Scrolls, including the Great Isaiah Scroll and other ancient biblical manuscripts discovered near Qumran.
Flavius Josephus, Antiquities of the Jews, Book 20
Josephus’ reference to James as the brother of “Jesus, who was called Christ.”
Tacitus, Annals, Book 15, Chapter 44
The Roman historian’s account of Christians in Rome and his statement that Christus was executed during the reign of Tiberius by Pontius Pilate.
The Dead Sea Scrolls and Early Biblical Manuscripts — Smithsonian Institution
Background on the antiquity and significance of the Dead Sea Scrolls and their biblical manuscripts.
The New Testament and Early Christianity
For further study, readers may also examine the dating and historical context of Paul’s letters, the Gospels, and other first-century Christian writings, as well as the early Christian testimony concerning Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection.
